With Epilepsy you never know what you are going to get. It's a minute by minute type of life... Well, for a parent it's more like a second to second type of life. You never know what is going to happen.. " Is she going to have a seizure?"what if , what if , what if... OR you may get to the "comfortable" stage, you know that stage where everything has been going good, no seizures and you start to let your guard down. And it never fails that's when it hits... A seizure or in this case some news.
We have been comfortable with Eliana, feeling pretty good that her seizures are pretty well maintained, which they have been . But, we forgot about the " after effects" and how her life may be changed by her seizures going uncontrolled for so long. We saw that side in October. The side where we noticed speech complications, to where she is stuttering with every word of her sentence. Now we knew she stuttered , but it seems like as soon as she started having seizure control this issue came about and stronger than ever. Her stuttering has gotten so bad at times its hard for her to complete her sentences. But , that is not all, Her Pre-K teacher came to be with a great deal of concern for our Eliana. She presumes to tell me that Eliana is having difficulty in her class. She seems to instantaneously forgot things. Her teacher will explain a task to her and she forgets with in seconds. Her Pre-K teacher has tried different tactics to help Eliana and has even asked other teachers for advise, but she still continues to have problems. It's not behavioral it's that she is not able to grasp the concept. She also says a lot of the time Eliana is in her class and she is just completely " out of it" and she doesn't know what is going on. Her teacher advised that Eliana goes into full-time Special Ed now. Which was a big pill to swallow, but I know it's for her own good.
I remember walking in to her class room and see the room full of colorful drawings and kids writing letters and their names but there was always a blank paper on the wall , with little to no drawing, coloring on it, and that was Eliana's... and I knew it was hers. It made me teary eyed to see that she wasn't doing what the other kids were doing. That is one of the last things you want to see is that your child is falling behind. I still wonder if it is her medication that is making her feel and act like that or what. I guess we will have to see. We are awaiting the Meeting with the Special Education department so they can re-evaluate her.
So it's another waiting game...
But no matter what I will always support her, be there for her, help her and love her with all that I have. ALWAYS! To me , she is my Eliana and she is PERFECT
Love always ,
Momma
